


Defective

by notZaros



Category: Invader Zim
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-10
Updated: 2020-10-10
Packaged: 2021-03-08 02:53:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,907
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26928439
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/notZaros/pseuds/notZaros
Summary: Love was removed from the Irken Empire for a reason.That reason is because the Control Brains decided that love was worthless, and had become an evolutionary dead end.Apparently, evolution didn't quite get the memo.
Relationships: Almighty Tallest Miyuki/Zim (Invader Zim)
Kudos: 17





	Defective

[MANY, MANY, MANY, MANY YEARS AGO]

Researcher Miyuki was bound to be Tallest one day, and a great one at that.

Her own Tallest had told her so, and how proud she felt at his praise could not be put into words - it gave her a warm feeling in her chest, and a certain anxiety-filled momentum carried her through the next few weeks, as she was overcome with the need to make him proud. When he arrived, instead of stopping at each project, investigating and inquiring as to each individual purpose, he proceeded straight to her, and she felt her heart soar.

He spoke, and time froze.

“You - whoever you are - see to the bothersome Soldier just outside the lab.”

Time resumed immediately after that, as he shuffled on to begin asking after everyone else’s projects instead.

She felt angry. Betrayed, somehow.

He did not recognize her.

She refused to lash out. Such an immature emotional response was to be reserved for a smeet whose Pak was devoid of the vast breadth of irken knowledge - despite how much she wanted to.

This was love. That made it okay.

It only took a few brief moments of crossing through the laboratory to reach the exit, and to exit through it thereafter

To her surprise, she saw a little irken - incredibly tiny, in fact - who was doing a spectacularly poor job of hiding himself.

“What-”

“Shush!” he whisper-yelled, “You do not see Zim!”

She stared.

“...okay,” she said after a moment. “I do not see Zim.” He cackled, rubbing his hands together. She giggled.

“Perfect! My plan is coming together smoothly!” He dashed from his ‘hiding’ space, straight at the laboratory door.

“Ah - that door isn’t going to-” she spoke, much too late.

He rammed into it at full force, and bounced off of it with something that sounded like an uncomfortable mix between a ‘zap’ and a ‘thud’, which sent him flying back some twenty feet.

“Well, I did try to warn you,” she said, a smile twitching at the edge of her lips. “What are you doing?”

“I must keep my eyes upon the Tallest, at all times!” he said urgently, hopping back up to his feet. “It is my mission - Spork gave it to me!”

“Is that so?” Miyuki gave a small glance towards the laboratory - she could leave him out here, ramming into the field over and over until he knocked himself out. The authorization barrier would prevent him from entering, unless some pitiable research member opened it for him. Alternatively, she could...follow him. Find Spork. Deal with him.

She sighed.

“Well, where is this ‘Spork’?” she asked.

“In the cafeteria!” Zim exclaimed, pulling out a pocket pak, “His schedule says so.”

Miyuki raised her eyebrows, but took the device regardless. It took her a moment to look it over; it was an incredibly detailed, minute-by-minute outline of this ‘Spork’ irken’s day, complete with notes slipped into the margins on how to best continue following him.

“Very well,” she said, “Let us go find him.”

“But, the Tallest-” Zim began.

“Will be quite fine, young Irken,” she soothed, leading him away.

“I am not young! I am a fully-grown Irken Soldier!” he exclaimed.

“What?” She stared down at him. “You are quite short for your age.”

“Well,” he muttered, sulking slightly, “Perhaps I am not quite fully grown,” he allowed.

She giggled again, feeling a certain amusement bubbling up in her chest.

“I suppose not - you must be the smallest irken on all of Irk!”

“Perhaps I am now,” he said, “But one day, I shall be Tallest!" he declared mightily.

She smiled, but restrained her amusement for now - it would do no good to poke at him until his temper was alight, regardless of how tall his temper may have been.

At least in regards to being short, of course.

“Well,” she said, “I am due to be Tallest myself, one day, if our Tallest is to be believed.”

“Then I wish you luck as my rival,” Zim replied as they entered the cafeteria.

She summed him up once more, bravado and all, and suppressed a giggle.

“I’ll be sure to need it, smallest irken,” she teased. He didn’t seem to notice the jab.

“He’s there!” Zim said, pointing towards one of the tables. Sitting there, Miyuki saw a lanky Invader, who was apparently enjoying his meal of donuts, chips, and a slushie.

He looked...dim.

Miyuki approached him, Zim in tow.

“Excuse me, Spork?”

“Yeah?” he asked, spewing crumbs in her direction.

“Did you give Zim the mission to follow the Tallest?” she pressed on.

“What? Oh, yeah,” he swallowed and scratched the back of his head. “Mission fulfilled, Zim. Good job. Here’s a donut.” He tossed one of the donuts at the little soldier, who caught it and threw it into his mouth without much circumstance.

“Wait, so- what was the-”

“He’s got a thing,” Spork said. “Y’know.”

“I...don’t, actually.” Miyuki glanced at Zim for a moment, then back at Spork. Then he

Miyuki blinked and shook her aching head; Spork was staring at her, still looking dim as ever, but she was now overcome with a sense of unease.

“Do you want a slushie?” he offered, holding an icy drink out to her.

“Uh - no, thank you.” She rubbed her eyes for a moment. “I, uh - I will lead Zim to his new...mission.”

“Sure,” Spork said, and turned back to his food.

“So, Zim-” she said, turning around, only to stop for a second. Zim was already saluting.

“Yes, my soon-to-be-Tallest?” She felt her face heat up and cleared her throat, forcing a sense of normal into her posture.

“Follow-” The intercom buzzed on before she could finish.

“Elite Trainees, please move to Simulation Room AT-12.”

“Ah,” she smiled awkwardly. “Go do - that.”

“At once!” He bowed deeply. “I will return to you later.”

She watched him run off to continue his training, and found a smile forcing its way onto her face; she didn’t feel like laughing, but she certainly felt...odd.

“He’s not an Elite Trainee,” Spork said, “But I suppose he’ll believe anything he wants to at this point.”

There were a couple moments of silence as Miyuki considered this new piece of information, and pitted it against the feeling in her gut.

“It must be nothing,” she muttered at length, and returned to the lab.

[MANY, MANY, MANY YEARS AGO]

“My tallest!”

Two heads swivelled towards the diminutive irken; one looked away right after, while the other made a grand attempt to pretend the little irken had not said what he did.

“Yes, Zim?” Miyuki asked as he approached. “Ah - that must be the recon set. Thank you, Zim.”

“Of course!” the irken replied, snapping off a salute after handing her a jumbled mess of wires and circuits.

“Return to your training,” she said curtly as she investigated the device.

There were a few minutes in the internim where she was left to her own machinations, pulling apart the mesh, straightening out bent wires, and generally doing her best to manage the unmanageable thing that was, purportedly, a ‘recon set’.

“Tallest, hm?”

“Oh- Tallest Klat!” She spun around in her chair and bent forward in a deep bow. “My apologies - I’m sure you noticed my growth rate, of course, but it-”

“No worries, researcher,” the much taller irken replied, waving his hand. “Zim’s persistent behavior has been noted for quite some time. The development I am more interested in is your ‘recon set’.”

“Ah - well, it’s not mine. It is Spork’s.”

“Is it, now?” The tallest raised an eyebrow. “Field testing your equipment, then? You certainly have initiative.”

“I meant-” She paused, and nodded. “Yes. Yes, I thought it best to test it in real time, rather than in a - simulation,” she said.

Her leader nodded again. Several minutes were spent explaining the device’s function, which was met with a commendation for her ‘cleverness’.

She nodded, but didn’t say much else to the praise. It felt wrong to take credit for someone else’s achievement - especially one so technically sophisticated as this.

She was left once more to her research afterwards. Several hours were spent fixing up and streamlining the device’s functions, until it was in a state that she could call ‘workable’; the rest of her time was focused on integrating her own flavor of radical new technology. Untested, perhaps, and technically illegal - but Invaders were rarely suspected of using dangerous, time-warping technology, so unless her Tallest connected a few dots and investigated the situation personally - unlikely at best - then she was in the clear.

Spork was at her side the moment she was done. She presented it to him without much fanfare.

“It looks a lot nicer. Thanks.” He stowed it away in his Pak.

“I took credit for it,” she blurted out in a fierce whisper. “I-”

“All the better,” Spork said. “The last thing this project needs is interference. For future reference, you do have permission to take all credit for - this,” he said, shrugging.

“Right. Of course.” Miyuki sighed and leaned back on her workstation. 

“You need a break.” The Invader yawned widely. “I’m going to go take a nap.”

Miyuki watched him leave, and felt the weight of exhaustion settle comfortably upon her shoulders; she fought the compulsion to yawn, but couldn’t quite deny her growing need to relax.

She sighed and proceeded to follow the Spork’s lead, tapping at a small device before quickly stowing it away. After a few moments, she took it out again, then stowed it away for good.

Several lightyears away, an attendant on the vacation planet of Itipa-2 watched disinterestedly as a reservation for an irken named ‘Miyuki’ was created in the system, followed shortly by another for an irken named ‘Zim’.

[MANY, MANY YEARS AGO]

Time had become meaningless.

This was not because Miyuki was a nihilist. It was not because she believed herself to be immortal, though she was certainly long-lived, as an Irken. Going further, it was also not because the slow, dreadful march of the Irken Empire seemed fated to reach the most distant corners of the universe. Inevitability was not equitable with omnipotence; Irk was strong, but there was always something lurking just beyond the veil. Only time could tell on that front, and it seemed keen to keep its secrets.

No. It was because Miyuki herself had decided that time was much too constrictive, and was much happier to live in a world devoid of deadlines.

As a blazing boom rippled through the void of space in slow motion, her loyal assistant cackled gleefully, and - beyond the prying eyes of her peers - she was more than pleased to join in.

The lack of consequences was also quite appealing, she noted.

“Wonderful shot, Zim! Shoot - that one!” she said, pointing to another ship slightly to the right of the one currently unfurling in a glorious ball of plasma.

“At your command, my Tallest!” A blast of explosive energy rippled through space, and made an impact square on the nose of the target. Zim navigated to its side and watched with glee as the ship was utterly decimated, from the front to the back.

She couldn’t remember the last time she had laughed so hard.

“Ha! Oh, glorious!” She stifled her mirth, tapping her subordinate on the shoulder. “Zim, bring us back to Irk - that’s enough fooling around for now.”

She couldn’t remember the last time she had laughed like that.

She couldn’t remember the last time she had laughed.

A small adjustment to a dial upon the rather cumbersome device stored upon the ship caused the explosion to slow further, until it appeared to be virtually immobile, like a three-dimensional painting.

Then they turned away, and zipped off towards their home planet.

There was a comfortable silence between the two as it flew through the void.

“Zim,” she said, “Stop the ship.”

The ship stopped.

“Come to me.”

The invader obeyed, dismounting the driver’s seat, turning about and approaching her.

“Yes, my Tallest?”

“I have a question for you.” Miyuki breathed in, slowly, then out. It was a foolish question, but it plagued her constantly. “Do you...love me?”

“Of course I do!” Zim dropped to one knee, his head bowed. “You are my leader! Your command is impeccable!”

“I know, but - do you love me?” The question hung in the air. The smaller irken appeared puzzled. “In - other ways.”

“Many other ways, my Tallest!” Zim resumed his standing position. “Your humor is excellent, and your vast intelligence is unquestionable!”

Miyuki laughed shakily.

“Yes, I - suppose that is true.” She dropped to her knees, and bent forward slightly. Zim came closer. “But - in other, other ways.”

“My Tallest, I must assure you,” Zim said, “I would follow you to the end of the universe, if you wished me to.”

“I know,” she said sadly, as she placed her hands on his shoulders. “But your loyalty is not what I am asking about.”

She leaned in, closed her eyes, and kissed him.

Had the universe not already been stopped in its tracks, she would have been convinced that it did when he kissed her back.

There would be consequences for this. The fractional amount of logic her mind could dredge up was on high alert, reviewing every facet of Irken caste law. If anyone ever found out - most importantly the Control Brains - there would be nowhere in the universe they could hide.

But this was love. 

That made it okay.

[MANY YEARS AGO]

As far as technology goes, the Irkens were at the forefront of their field.

Most of the technology they developed was beyond advanced, and required a literal lifetime of training to understand - hence, the caste system - and in most cases, only the Tallest or the researchers were allowed into the laboratories.

In this outlying case, however, a dull-looking Irken Elite was following behind a much taller Irken Researcher.

“Ah, you found your test-” began another researcher, who fell into stride with the first.

“Do not,” she cut him off, glaring at him lightly, “Call him a test subject.” This gave her fellow researcher pause for thought, as he spared a glance back to the short Elite.

“But...he is the one you selected for this particular test. Which he will be subjected to. Hence, he is your test subject.” They stopped before a large, circular door, and the taller researcher tapped on the keypad that appeared.

“He is mine in many ways,” she allowed curtly, “But test subject is somewhere near the end of that list.” The door slid open and the Irkens stepped through.

Before them was a lab outfitted with the conventional trappings of a biological research facility. Specimen tanks, surgical implements and tables, monitor stations, and a number of life support generators.

It was practically brand new - never used.

“I still cannot say I at all understand your intent with this project; you wish to...replicate your defect, within the-”

“His name is Zim,” she interrupted a second time as he led the smaller Irken to one of the vats. “And I would encourage you not to call it a ‘defect’, though I suppose we are beyond that point.”

“...of course.” The researcher coughed awkwardly. “And his opinion on the matter?”

“He does not have one.”

There was a moment of silence.

“He does not have one, as in, he is apathetic, or-”

“He does not have one,” she stressed, picking up the Elite and placing him in one of the empty tanks, “The Control Brains erased his Pak. No personality, no memories, no mind remains.” The other researcher gawked as the pod closed and began to fill with incubation liquid, and mechanical tendrils connected to the small Irken’s Pak.

“What! Then he must - then, he is-”

“Defective, Lort. He is defective.” The female researcher was visibly shaking. “They took him away from me - everything about him, the way he thought, the way he laughed-”

“Miyuki, stop!” Lort exclaimed, pulling her away from the console, “This - this is too far! Reactivating his Pak, restoring the destroyed data - it only ensures a yet more corrupt data path-”

“I do not care,” she replied coldly, shoving him back. “I will - fix him. Fix these ‘shmillion errors’ he warned them of - he is mine, and only mine.” She turned back to the tank, within which floated the now dormant form of Zim. “Nobody else has any right to him. He promised me that.”

“Promises fall apart when the intent is to defy the Control Brains!” Lort yelled, enunciating every syllable. “I warn you - stop this immediately, or I will-!”

Miyuki’s eyes flashed, and he stopped moving entirely. Paralyzed, fixed in place.

“You will do nothing. You will speak of this to nobody.” Her gaze was sharper than a Porval electron blade. “Do I make myself clear, Lort?”

“Yes, you do. My apologies.” Immediately thereafter, he bent over forward and collapsed onto his hands and knees, while Miyuki redirected her attention to the console. “Wait, you - how did you-”

“Just one of the many advancements Spork and I have been collaborating on - oh, but collaboration between castes is beneath us, isn’t it?” She hummed as she continued working the console. “Ah, well, I’m sure my dignity will recover.”

Lort glared at her as he drew himself up to a standing position and crossed his arms, turning to face ‘Zim’ as he floated in the incubation vat.

“If this - falls apart, somehow,” he said slowly, “It will be on your head. You will be erased from the collective for your crimes.”

“I’d like to see them try,” she said coolly. “Our oath was not one-sided; I belong to him as much as he belongs to me.”

“It would very much please me if you could tell me that you are not implying what I think you are implying,” her fellow responded smoothly, however ill-at-ease he felt.

“Then I should be very pleased, indeed, that my mission is not to please you.” One cable extended from her Pak and plugged into the console; information began to flow through it, relaying terabytes of data per second.

“Then you are, without any doubt, the biggest idiot in the Irken Empire.”

She did not glare at him; in fact, she did not look at him at all. She simply paused, and then continued typing, as if the insult was barely worthy of a response, if any at all.

Lort eyed her curiously.

“If there is more you wish to say, then say it.” She gave him a passive side-glance. “I am well aware of what you must be thinking.”

“Did it hurt, at all?” he asked, his curiosity overcoming his hesitance. “When his Pak’s data was destroyed?”

“More than you will ever know,” she replied smoothly. “If you must - imagine a hand reaching into your skull, crushing your brain, and pulling it out through a hole the size of a Porval rifle’s barrel.”

“Ah,” Lort said. “And…well, why Zim, of all Irkens?” 

“He promised me that he would, some day, adopt my ‘defect’ - the source of my affections for him.” She sighed. “But that was simply another way of saying ‘I love you’. He simply did not know how to say it.”

“Well, yes, but - why Zim?” he asked again, “He was clearly a source of trouble since the day he was extracted from his pod. Why did you choose him, rather than a superior Irken?”

She stopped, taking his words into consideration - rolling them around her head for a few moments.

“Well,” she said, continuing to type, “Love has never been something we could understand in the first place. Its removal from our society - whenever that was - made it even more intangible than it was before.”

“What an incredible non-answer,” Lort remarked dryly.

“You lack perspective,” she sighed, “Unless, of course, you would like to adopt my ‘defect’-”

“No! No, I am quite fine without it,” Lort interjected, waving his hands.

“Suit yourself, then.”

Another bout of silence came around, as they both watched the diminutive form of the irken floating in the vat.

“Perhaps,” Lort began, “This whole conundrum is entirely the reason why we-”

“Do not even start that conversation. It will not end well,” Miyuki said, cutting him off.

Wisely, Lort did not continue his train of thought.

[YEARS AGO]

Miyuki found it hard to believe the position she was in.

“You stand accused of ‘love’.”

The day before, she had been granted the position of Tallest.

“How do you plead?”

And now, she was being persecuted.

“Not guilty. I have not committed a crime.”

“Reactivation of a defective is a crime,” the Control Brains responded. “It is at your insistence that we label it as ‘love’.”

“Zim has been made non-defective,” she replied; the Elite stood in her shadow, watching warily from behind her.

“Impossible. Corrupt data paths cannot be uncorrupted.” The Control Brains glared down at them. “And you are at risk of being corrupted.”

“Zim is not corrupted!” Zim yelled, stepping into the light, “And my Tallest is-”

“At risk of corruption.” The Control Brains continued to stare them down. “You will admit your failure or be erased.”

“I am NOT a fail- urgh!” Zim was suddenly suspended twenty feet in the air by a cable, and convulsing uncontrollably; Miyuki lurched.

“Stop,” she spat through gritted teeth, clutching her head, “STOP!”

Another cable extended and snapped into Miyuki’s Pak, sending her to her knees before the Control Brains.

“Your link is being dissolved. Zim’s corruption cannot be allowed to spread,” the left brain stated.

“If Zim is not defective, he must prove his worth without external influence,” the right continued.

The next ten minutes were spent in silence; the sound of electrical pulses echoed throughout the auditorium, as its only two occupants watched. Two Irkens who were only allowed to attend the ceremony by sheer technicality, who had also sworn an oath never to speak of what they saw under penalty of painful, spiky death.

One held a cold, judging demeanor; the other was much the same, though they were directed towards very different things.

At the eleventh minute, one of the two spoke.

“I had to do it.” The other irken only glared harder. “He is _defective_ , Spork.”

“Was defective,” the taller irken replied. “Corruption can’t spread across Paks.”

“You don’t know that,” the first hissed. “ _You_ are an _Invader_. It is not your _job_ to know that!”

The Invader regarded him with a steely gaze - one that cut deeper than Lort would have liked to admit.

“Miyuki was right about you, Lort,” Spork said simply. “You are the most heartless irken in the entire universe.”

Lort did not respond.

“Lucky you, I suppose.” Spork turned around, and walked away. “The perfect Irken.”

He left the researcher alone, exiting the auditorium before he could watch whatever became of the pair on trial.

In the center, the electricity and the convulsing finally ceased; Zim’s body was dropped coldly onto the central platform, next to Miyuki’s.

“The trial has concluded,” the Control Brains chorused. “Tallest Miyuki, return to the Irken Capital. Elite Soldier Zim, return to your training.”

As the two stumbled to their feet and exited the area via floating platform, almost like puppets being pulled along by strings, Lort turned away.

“I had to,” he repeated to himself. “I had no other choice.”

**Author's Note:**

> Solely because I feel like the manic energy conjured between these two would probably be a feasible alternative energy source if it could be harvested.


End file.
